LORD LAIRD'S INDULGENCES!

I'm sorry - but I can't resist this. As someone who is left cold by the entire Ulster-Scots jamboree, I was nonetheless entertained to read in the Belfast Telegraph that the noble Lord Laird (pictured left in full fling) was at the centre of fresh revelations about Ulster-Scots Agency spending as details of hefty taxpayer-funded taxi bills were made public for the first time.

The veteran UUP politician has denied any responsibility for his travel costs as agency chairman in 2000 and 2001. (My goodness - an Ulster Unionist being irresponsible - whatever next?) The bills included taxi fares of £240 and £260 for Belfast to Dublin return trips and £272.50 for a Co Derry journey.

A total of £2,505 was spent on taxis over 10 months during this period. Lord Laird today said he had not been responsible for the agency's accounts. The present-day price of a standard first class return rail ticket from Belfast to Dublin starts at £59.

My biggest laugh was reserved for the line;

"The peer defended some of his taxi use on personal security grounds, linked to his practice of wearing a kilt for functions. "Am I going to turn up somewhere, get out of a car and walk half a mile to a function wearing a kilt? That would be drawing attention to me," he said.

This from a man whose enthusiasm for finding photo opportunities makes Robert Kilroy Silk seem shy and retiring! I know that there are some good people out there who enjoy Ulster-Scots culture and fair play to them, I can respect their preferences - but NOT care of the UK tax-payer! Lord Laird is beyond caricature, but his expenses should not be beyond public scrutiny. Congrats to the Telegraph!

Comments

[Jacko]

Like you DV I find the whole Ulster-Scots thing an embarassment. The comically named Lord Laird being jester-in-chief. I heard him on the radio trying to justify his enormous taxi fares on the basis of security fears in Dublin because he attends functions in a kilt and even how disasterous it would be to the peace process if he were to be harmed down there. The man is an absolute lunatic. I was down in Dublin on business last November and was surprised but extremely heartened to see people, not a terrible lot but some, walking about with poppies in. No-one was taking a blind bit of notice. But Laird Laird (so good they named him twice) would have us believe that, not only is he so well known he is instantly recognisable, but that people would be attacking him because he was wandering about in a kilt.

Section him, maybe, (particularly if they were unfortunate enough to fall into conversation with him) but hardly attack him.

I know extremely high profile unionist politicians who would travel to Dublin infrequently and always use the train - the worst that has ever happened has been someone waving at them and cracking a joke.

As he was complaining of lack of funding for his pet embarassment he was, at the same time, travelling in style and at great expense with the bill being footed by the taxpayer.

Laird Laird: a pompous, hypocritical, money grubbing ass.

[slackjaw]

Sometimes I wonder if this man is a PR genius and his buffoonery is calculated with the sole intention of keeping Ulster-Scots foremost in the national consciousness. If so, I admire his commitment.

While more high-profile unionist politicians might be recognised in Dublin, Lord Laird would not. The photograph on ATW is the first I have seen of him.

If I saw a man in a kilt at Connolly Station, I would not be inclined to assume that this was Lord Laird. Nor would anyone else. No-one is likely to say anything, other than 'oh - a man in a kilt'. Perhaps the more daring might offer 'is it true what they say about Scotsmen and their kilts?'

But I have not seen kilt-botherers frequenting train stations or bus stations on either side of the border. Even if such undesirables did lurk in wait for the Enterprise on its arrival in Connolly Station, one only has to descend the steps to Amiens St where a taxi rank replete with his beloved taxis awaits.

I have used taxis in Dublin on many occasions and have yet to hear a driver offer disparaging opinions on men who wear kilts, so I think we can safely assume that Lord Laird would be welcome abaird.

[David Vance]

slackjaw/jacko,

Couldn't agree more....loved the "so good they named him twice" line...! He's a loony. How on earth did he get on so well within the UUP..mmmm

[Michael Turley]

He should conincide his journeys with Scotland away matches to Lansdowne Road. He might even consider wearing one of those funny hats with red hair poking out as a disguise should any unruly native seek to repress his sartorial expression of Ulster-Scots culture.

Do they wear kilts in Ballymena?

[onions]

You're right there Michael. At Scotland rugby games in Dublin thousands of people are wandering around in kilts singing songs of their nation (and they do it at Stag parties too). Dubliners have no issue with that sort of thing on any occasion, and if Laird thinks they do then he's just paranoid.

But I'd suggest there was a just a bit of 'ah who cares about the train - i'm the internationally-renowned Lord Laird, I travel by taxi!' The kilt thing seems to me to be a red herring. Sure he could bring his kilt in a bag.

I've got a lot of respect for him and he has put a lot on the line for his beliefs. He's a decent enough oul mucker when compared with so many in public life here.

But the man has a tendency, some might say, to be a bit above himself. Up himself, even. Up his own kilt perhaps. And what a charming thought that is.

[Michael Turley]

Lord Laird should encourage all proud Ulster-Scots to wear the correct cultual attire at all times and not just for the odd taxi trip to banana republic capitals. For how long will the Ulster-Scots allow themselves to be subjugated by the anglocentric UKs chauvanistic cultural attitude to the garments of a once proud people?

Another famous kilt wearer is that defrocked Irish priest who ruined the olympic marathon recently (altgough he favours the plain kilt as worn by the once proud and truly great Gaels of the north).

[Jacko]

Just as an after thought - I was genuinely impressed by the complete lack of interest shown in the people I saw wearing poppies.
Fair play to the Dubliners - both the group and the inhabitants.

[Ciarán]

...makes Robert Kilroy Silk seem shy and retiring...

Is this an opportunity for dusting off all those Orangeman jokes?

[David Vance]

jacko,

Can I just say that I think Dubliners are a great people....I am lucky to more quite a few and more decent people you could not meet.

[Howard]

Dubliners are a great people, as indeed are the vast majority of people from the south. A great land - and very successful economically and socially too.

[Colm]

David

Carry on praising Dubliners like this and Andrew - "I admit it I can't stand the Oirish" - will storm off ATW

[Frank]

Who is the good Laird Laird? What is his
(clan)family name and can anyone give me some of his CV details,i.e.,oval arenas, fairgrounds and past places of employment where he may have performed? In short, what is this clown's background?

Frank

[windshield replacement]

I heard about it on some papers last week.

[Tomás Ó Cáthaigh]

Hes a right one all right, cant see the wood for the trees. Ive a satire done on him on YouTune you can see on the link below!!!

[Affordable Auto Glass]

Couldn't agree more.... hes right

[Parbrize auto]

this is hilarious